Maybe it’s a version of Schadenfreude, but we get a secret delight from stories about dumb criminals. After reading such stories, we can smugly conclude, with a self-congratulatory pat on the back: At least we’re not that stupid.

Here’s a case in which an arrestee apparently was stupid in love, as the saying goes.

Police in Lancaster, Kentucky, recently answered a complaint from a citizen about a stolen laptop. When the officer arrived, he encountered an intoxicated man who announced that he just had to go to jail so he could emotionally support his girlfriend, who was serving time. Without him nearby, she’d be stressed out, he said.

In an effort to get arrested, the man shoved the officer. The officer refused to get drawn into a fight, which didn’t suit the complainant’s plans at all.

So what did he do?

He pulled out bundle of drug paraphernalia, the police department said.

Bingo! That netted him charges of possession of methamphetamine, heroin and drug paraphernalia.

No word on whether he’s been able to see his girlfriend, though.

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